I’m a very stable genius, and my greatest assets – two —
Have been my mental stability and also my I.Q.
All the colleges I went to were the very best there are.
Tops at business, ran for office, was a great big TV star.

A Lying Liar wrote a book, the title’s “Fire and Fury.”
I tweet about it (sometimes when I speak my speech is slurry).
I never met the man except for those three hours we chatted,
And now talk’s at a fever pitch: they say that I’m mad-hatted.

Anyone who questions if I’m sane, then they’re the crazy ones.
No one works as hard as I do, all the rest are lazy bums.
I don’t even take vacations, that’s a fact – no hesitation;
Even when I’m on the golf course, I’m engaged in legislation.

Most evenings when I go to bed, I munch and watch TV.
I catch up on Fake News and see what’s being said ‘bout me.
I eat fast food so I am sure my meals have not been spiked.
In all of history, I am now the leader who’s most liked!

I loved it when the Russians were behind the DNC hack.
The Rocket Man is threatening – I threatened him right back.
I said that Mexico would pay to build the wall – I lied.
I told my wife I wouldn’t win and when I did, she cried.

I like to keep it quick due to my short attention span,
But that’s the only thing that’s short — regardless of my hands.
I try to sleep with wives of friends through making conference calls.
The FLOTUS is actually my Third; nobody seems appalled…

Since Day One it’s said my administration is chaotic;
Perhaps I can be switched out with that new version robotic.
Some guy began to heckle it, as if ‘twere really me —
When all along the real dummy is living in DC.