We Need Some Global Warming

(To the tune of “We Need A Little Christmas”)

Call out this folly
We need more oil and so we’re going to excavate
Fill up your gas tanks
I may be rushing things, but let’s deregulate now

For we need some global warming
Right this very minute
Never mind the science
This is how we’ll spin it
For humanity to flourish
Got to make it hotter
Climate change is just a theory
Disproven by that snow in Erie

So climb down your high horse
I can’t believe in things that I have never seen
Just like a fruitcake
It’s time I roll back regs on leaks of benzene allowed

For I’ve grown a little meaner
Grown a little bolder
Keeping air less cleaner —
Value for stockholders
And the long-term implications?
Eyes of the beholder
Need some global warming now.

Haul out the clean coal
What they have taught you all is just a fantasy
Slice up the profits
Don’t tell the emperor he’s got no pants to see now…

For we need a warmer surface
It’s quite beneficial
Failing to take action
Soon makes it official
Just as long as we have sunlight
Insight’s superficial
Need some global warming now.
EPA’s brainstorming how!

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