Tüber

A Harvard professor recommends no more than six French fries per serving.

According to an expert, our choice to fry a spud
in tasty, slender, salted strips is something of a dud.
A serving size of six is all this fellow is proposing,
which hardly seems enough to satisfy my French fry jonesing.

Honestly, this shouldn’t come as much of a surprise,
considering what else we tend to eat with our French fries:
a juicy, fat-filled burger, and a rich and creamy shake,
and afterwards, we run the risk the bathroom scale may break.

The willpower necessary to adhere to this amount
means while we’re pigging out, we also have to keep a count.
This Harvard prof may think we are impressed with his diploma –
but no way I’ll do math while slipping into a food coma.