Jesus Is Just Contrite With Me

Donald Trump: Ordained By God. I like the sound of that.
When Rick Perry made that statement – why, I very nearly shat.
Perhaps it’s not as catchy as my re-election slogan,
But comforting to know that by the Lord God I’ve been chosen.

God is very active in the details, day-by-day,
And made it so in 2016 I could have my way.
Perry said that God has made the use of folks not perfect
(Although I was perfecto at the last time Him or Her checked).

Rick told me that I hadn’t gotten here without God’s blessing,
But, honestly – a butler took me right into the West Wing.
He said that God is using me, and grace does much abound.
But I’m not being used here; it’s the other way around.

There’s lots of evangelicals now serving at my pleasure:
Like Perry, Pence and Rick Pompeo – last time I took measure.
But don’t bet I’m a Bible scholar; you might lose that wager,
Since all I know of Scripture, Rick provided: a one-pager.

Rick Perry is a man of faith, a Holy Roller fellow,
A Christian. (When he comes for lunch, dessert is evan-Jello.)
He told me nothing’s accidental in the universe,
And you can’t question what God does – no matter how perverse.

When Rick said I’d been chosen, I asked, “Drafted – like a sports team?”
But then he clarified; some sort of heavenly support scheme.
I’m happy God has chosen me, and hope that He’ll remember
I still hope to be His Chosen One when folks vote next November.

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