I’ve just pulled us back from the brink of a war
That I quite nearly started five short days before.
We suffered no casualties; damage was minimal
(Ignoring that Middle East wars are unwinnable).
The evidence bolstering this threat: compelling,
But share it with anyone? Nope; we ain’t telling.
That order to kill Soleimani? I signed it –
And not even I knew the reasons behind it.
Iran’s standing down; no more shit will they step in.
I will not allow them a nuclear weapon.
The latest installment of this region’s drama
Is clearly not my fault – it’s all on Obama.
Obama’s attempts to bring peace were misguided:
He gave Iran billions – and with this provided
The funding for all of the missiles they pitched.
(This claim, by the way, from the facts is unhitched.)
“Fools feel the need to say something” – that’s Plato.
So here’s something I said: let’s now involve NATO.
That organization can handle demands
From this impasse – of which I will now wash my hands.
I love to resolve crises of my own making,
But with this attack I’ve left many heads shaking.
And there was a casualty – one quite a few fear:
All hope of revealing the absolute truth here.