Each year at Thanksgiving, I pardon some turkeys.
This year: “Corn” and “Cob” – and then one other jerk. He’s
a fellow who lied about speaking with Russians,
as well to the V.P. about those discussions.
When I fired Mike Flynn, I said he’d done wrong.
I then later reversed, with a dance and some song,
by proclaiming the actions that led to his firing
were far from illegal; in fact, were inspiring.
Despite the fact two separate times Flynn pled guilty,
I felt that his righteousness could be rebuilt. He
was mentioned at rallies I held, where I said the
Deep State complex made him a real cause célèbre.
I tried hard to get the Department of Justice
to drop Mike Flynn’s case – this, despite its robustness.
That action was thwarted; a judge, name of Sullivan,
stepped in and would not award Mike Flynn a mulligan.
But now, with this pardon, that action’s been thwarted.
For keeping his mouth shut, Mike Flynn’s been rewarded.
I’ll issue more pardons for those who protected me,
and do so in haste – since you’ve not re-elected me.