Everything that Cohen told the Congress was a lie –
Except when he said there’d been no collusion between I
And my campaign and Russia. (Well, he might have been a bit suspicious.
But as far as I’m concerned, his hunch was meretricious.)

It seems my faith in Michael Cohen surely was mislaid.
I quickly came to that conclusion; took a mere decade.
He lied about so many things, all arrogance and boast.
How fortunate for me he backed me when it counted most.

I’ve heard that Michael Cohen wrote a love letter to me,
As Chairman Kim’s done also. (What a lover I must be!)
Compare the book to why he testified he’s going rogue – he
Falls apart when under pressure, like an over-cooked pierogi.

The Congress must demand a transcript – he will be discredited!
Though, according to the publisher, the book’s not edited
And perhaps not even written yet; no words on any pages.
But in my mind I picture what he’d write; therefore my rages.

I’ve got to get all talk of Michael Cohen off the airwaves.
Dealing with this mishegas has kept me off the fairways.
Then there’s Jared Kushner’s clearance; Southern District interference…
I keep stepping in a pile of impropriety appearance.

Beware the Ides of March; it means opprobrium is pending.
Cohen’s going to testify again; it’s never-ending.
I’ll vilify his character at every opportunity –
Then we will see what comes from Allen Weisselberg’s immunity.

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