It’s the most basket-full day of the year
With the parking lots crowded
Online in the cloud — it’s increasingly clear
The worst job in the whole world is cashier
It’s the crap-crappiest reason of all
To spend more than you’re earning
Your credit’s concerning and soon score will fall
It’s the worst possible day at the mall
There’ll be TVs for grabbing
A great deal of haggling
And fist fights wherever you go
Mom and Dad will tell stories:
Long-gone inventories
Of iPhones – sold out long ago
It’s the un-holiest season for sure
There’ll be lots of kvetching
With all hope they’re fetching discount haute couture
Don’t you know cash won’t buy gayety?
While ignoring issues so weighty
Like the kids starving in Haiti
It’s the most plunder-ful time — of — the — year!
Among many worthy causes to choose from, your donation here will do much good: https://hopeforhaiti.com
